Each week, artist Erika Moen explores some aspect of sex and reports back on the result for her illustrated column, Oh Joy Sex Toy. This week, Erika gets handed an interesting task: a set of vibrators you wear on your fingers.
Want more from Erika Moen? Oh Joy, Sex Toy: Volume One is 268 pages of sex tips, interviews, sex toy reviews, and more! Get your autographed copy at BitchMart.
Here is a text transcription of the comic to make it more accessible for people using screen readers. Transcription by Morgan Kelly.
Erika introduces this comic enthusiastically, “Dearest Perverts, today Matthew and I tried out something totally new.” Matthew chimes in, “Hello, HELLO TOUCH. Graciously sent to us by Jimmy Jane.” The accompanying diagram indicates “The Deets” of the Hello Touch, a battery-powered vibrator you wear on your fingers. The diagram includes the price, material, and size. Erika explains, “Vibrating pads are strapped to your finger tips… with the battery pack attached to your wrist.”
Matthew says, “I was totally stoked to get this in the mail!! It looks like something straight out of a cyberpunk movie like Hackers! A sci-fi virtual reality sex glove!” Matthew is set against a virtual reality background featuring the cast of Hackers yelling, “Hack the planet!!!”
Erika looks dubious as she says, “I was kinda skeptical about this guy, actually. A girlfriend once tried a similar toy on me years ago and I was left… underwhelmed. Turns out, we were both in store for a surprise! I actually really enjoyed it! By having such tiny vibrators attached to your partner’s fingertips, the stimulation is a lot more nuanced and natural than a big ol’ hunk of vibrator pressed up against your nethers. It’s all the artful mastery and natural flow of your partner’s hands stroking you, plus an extra bit of gentle vibration!”
Matthew scowls, “I hated it. Hello Touch is super hard to turn on and then once you do, the finger bands reduce circulation while vibrating them senseless, so you lose all feeling in your fingertips. I couldn’t tell what I was touching or how hard.”
Erika jumps in, “But that was just because of your larger fingers. When I tried on the glove, it didn’t bother me at all. At last, an advantage to having itty bitty hands! And to think, I used to get made of it for how small they are.” She then flashes an evil grin and cackles, “WHO’S LAUGHING NOW, NERDS? Muahaha!”
Erika continues, “Masturbating while wearing the glove was super lovely and I was REALLY impressed with how unobtrusive it was during partnered, penis-in-vagina sex.” Matthew adds, “Yeah, I will say that of the ‘use this during intercourse’ type vibrators we’ve tried, this one was honestly the best fit. Wasn’t in the way at all!”
Erika raises a finger, “Though it only has one vibe speed which isn’t strong and couldn’t quite get me there. I’d say this is a really nice ‘warm up’ toy, to get you aroused and your blood flowing. If you’re super, super, sensitive down there, it might be enough to get you off, even!”
Erika and Matthew conclude this comic by sitting closely in the palm of a hand wearing the Hello Touch, “But seriously, it’s a very gentle vibe, less powerful than a basic bullet vibe which would only cost about fifteen bucks, as compared to Hello Touch’s $65. So would you recommend it?” Matthew replies, “Absolutely not, save your dollars. Would you?” Erika says, “Yeah, actually! It’s really fun and lets the wearer show off the skillfulness of their finger stokes. I’d say the Hello Touch is a definite finger blast.”